Category — lifestyle optimization

As A Quality Lady Would Think, Part 1: A Lady Does Not Try To Grab Something In Exchange For Nothing

Given the recent online conversations about Kelley Williams-Bolar, now is a good time to review some concepts discussed during the Joining Better Networks series of posts.


I said the following in replying to a reader’s recent email about Ms. Williams-Bolar.

I’m not sympathetic to this mother. Not at all. She’s a thief who stole the benefit of other people paying thousands of property tax dollars each year into that school district. If she was so concerned about getting her daughter into that school, why didn’t she move and rent her own apartment in that school district? Also, I don’t agree with how the teacher’s unions are being demonized [in the link I was sent about the story].

To sum up: The way this site (and other folks) are framing the issue deliberately misses the point, as far as I’m concerned. The schools are better in certain areas because of the many types of investments that concerned parents are paying into those schools. Parents in high-performing districts are paying into their local schools through their property taxes. They also pay by their active participation in ensuring their own child’s behavior and performance while at school. Parents in high-performing districts also aren’t doing what most African-Americans do―which is use the local public schools as a free babysitting service while taking no interest or participation whatsoever in their children’s behavior at school.

The schools’ performance in any given district are a reflection of the neighborhood parents’ level of personal investment in those schools, and investment in ensuring their own children’s academic performance.

As far as I’m concerned, they should force the mother in that news story to pay for the benefit that her daughter got as a result of all those other parents who actually live in that school district paying thousands of dollars in property taxes each year. Basically, this mother defrauded all these other people into subsidizing her child’s education in addition to their own children’s education. While this mother apparently chipped in nothing. I’m not feeling that woman. Not at all…


As mentioned during this post,

Humans are social animals, and always cluster into various groups. Unless you’re a hermit, you’re a member of various (sometimes overlapping) groups. These networks vary in size, purpose, and effectiveness.

Most African-American women need to find and join new, healthy networks in the global village. Because their current all-Black networks tend to be accidentally chosen, non-reciprocating, and often downright destructive. However, to join productive networks, most African-American women will need to change the way they approach networking. Most importantly, they will need to change their understanding of the entire process.

. . .


When most African-Americans speak of networking, what they’re really describing is coattail riding. It doesn’t occur to them that they should or need to contribute value to the target person they want to benefit from. Especially when that target person is also African-American. Most African-Americans have an entitlement, “hook me up” mindset. That’s why you hear all this talk of expecting other African-Americans to “reach back,” and “set up programs” for them. It’s all one-sided. The people looking for the handout from other Blacks never say what they’re going to do in exchange for any assistance given. Because they don’t intend to do anything except TAKE from that person. And if you don’t hook them up, then they create an entire narrative in their minds about how you must be jealous and evil. It’s irrational.

In addition to being irrational, this mindset is unattractive. Most productive, mutually supportive networks don’t look kindly on chiselers and thieves. The African-American collective is the only one that gives knee-jerk support and sympathy to thieves. The nonblack political ideologues (such as the nonblack libertarians) who support Ms. Willimams-Bolar’s style of thievery are only doing so because they want to destroy unions and organized labor. After all, these are the same people who want to end the minimum wage, and are opposed to affirmative action.

Let’s be clear: out in the (non-African-American) real world, most people don’t like chiselers and thieves. So, it’s best not to be one if you want to be welcome among productive social networks. A quality lady is not a chiseler or a thief looking to grab something for nothing.

January 29, 2011   143 Comments

Free Nightingale-Conant Materials on iTunes

African-American zombies will always gravitate to (and consume) maggot-infested entertainment products. They’ve created an endless negative cycle. The trash they watch, listen to, and read lowers their already-lowered mentalities. It also whets their appetites for even worse materials. These are some of the mental habits of the Losers and Left-Behinds.

Meanwhile, Sojourners gravitate to (and consume) life-enhancing entertainment and educational products. Now is a good time to mention some of the free Nightingale-Conant content that’s available on iTunes.

Browse. Listen. Enjoy!

January 25, 2011   37 Comments

One Product And One Resource For Getting In Touch With Your Inner “Emma Peel”


I’ve always greatly preferred the 1960s character of Emma Peel over any of the women in the James Bond movies that I’ve seen (past or present era). Well, I’ve recently run across one product and one resource in particular that can help a woman get in touch with her glamorous and dazzling inner “Emma Peel”. . .

. . . . The rest of the premium content in this entry has been sent to regular commenters.

January 16, 2011   No Comments

Retire Early Lifestyle

As explained by their website, Retire Early Lifestyle,

In 1991 Billy and Akaisha Kaderli retired at the age of 38. Now, into their 20th year of this financially independent lifestyle, they invite you to take advantage of their wisdom and experience.

They are the authors of the ebook, The Adventurer’s Guide to Early Retirement, 3rd Edition: A Common Sense Approach. I haven’t finished reading their book, but I’ve been impressed with what I’ve read so far. It’s practical, thorough, and inspiring. My only caveat would be that their experiences are those of a former high-income couple. Most people don’t have the sort of savings and investment portfolio they had at the point when they cashed in and got out of the rat race. Nevertheless, it IS possible for people starting out with less money to combine:

  • the creation of multiple passive income streams, and
  • the reduction of expenses (in other words, living below one’s means), and
  • the tips and strategies described in great detail in their book

to create a lifestyle for themselves in which they DON’T have to trade their life for money with the daily grind of a 9-to-5 job. At minimum, it’s possible to significantly reduce one’s dependence on a job.

As Sojourners, we already know we can create our own “luck.” And make our daily lives more about what we want to do, as opposed to what we have to do. Check out the resources at their site, and their recent interview with the Wall Street Journal.

January 4, 2011   51 Comments

Sojourner’s Passport Confidential: “Limitless”


What if you could become the perfect, optimized version of yourself? What if you could fully use the talents that God has already given you?

It’s possible. And unlike the main character in the upcoming movie “Limitless,” you don’t need a pill to make it happen. . . . . . . The rest of the premium content in this entry has been sent to regular commenters.


It’s been brought to my attention that I’ve accidentally overlooked several regular commenters. I apologize for the oversight; the process of going through the comments has been more involved than I anticipated. Please feel free to contact me if you’re a regular commenter and you haven’t received the Limitless dispatch.

January 2, 2011   1 Comment