Britain Reveals The Dead-End Future For “Black Love” In The US—48% Of West Indian Black Men In The UK Are In Relationships With Nonblack Women
Instead of the usual handwringing that African-American women do about these issues, let’s look at some trend lines in terms of our own interests as Sojourners.
AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN WHO BELIEVE IN THE “BLACK LOVE” MYTH ARE DOOMED
African-American women who are Black Love Dead-Enders are doomed. The trend lines don’t favor their delusions or delusional slogans about “Black love.” As I mentioned in an early post,
Mark my words: The “Black women as martyrs” recruiters will keep demanding that you martyr yourself no matter what happens. They will continue making these demands until the final demise of the African-American collective. They will repeat the same slogans as African-Americans continue becoming more deeply entrenched in permanent underclass status, and overall disintegration.
They will keep making these demands of you even after the African-American out of wedlock birthrate reaches 90-95 percent. The 1965 Moynihan Report warned about the rising illegitimacy rate among African-Americans. Most of our people didn’t heed the warning. Instead, we recited angry slogans in response.
They will keep making these demands of you even after the African-American male interracial relationship rate approaches 50 percent and beyond. For those of you who think this can’t or won’t happen, I would refer you to the current example of the Caribbean Black male population in the United Kingdom. West Indian Black men’s interracial relationship rate in the UK has reached 48 percent. (See the BBC Caribbean.com story from January 19, 2009, The Mixed Race March in Britain.)
In fact, the UK situation is a sneak preview of how African-American men will continue their singular focus on seeking their own individual bliss while the deceived masses of Black women in the U.S. keep trying to uphold “Black love” and the “Black family” . . . all by themselves.
In the US, this “Black love” and “Black marriage” talk is a dead end. As I said in that same post,
FOR EXAMPLE, STOP TRYING TO SAVE “BLACK MARRIAGE” IN AMERICA—IT WON’T BE RESURRECTED BECAUSE 50% OF THE NEEDED PARTICIPANTS—BLACK MEN—PREFER THAT IT REMAINS DEAD
There won’t be any collective solution to what has been called “Black Marital Mogadishu” in the United States because 50% of the participants needed for any Black marriage—Black men—benefit from the current absence of marriage among African-Americans. Black men generally like things the way they are right now.
The collapse of the African-American family is not about a lack of jobs. It’s about African-American men generally being content with the collapse of the African-American family. Black men will complain about the aftershocks created by the mass absence of marriage among African-Americans, such as the legions of fatherless, violent Black male criminals. But other than that, they’re content with the status quo.
Anybody who thinks that this behavior is driven by a lack of opportunity should examine the collective behavior of the African-American men who do have “good” educations and jobs. Since so many Black men in that category are not marrying at all, or they’re not marrying Black women, there’s no reason to assume that Black women would gain from African-American men having more opportunities. I learned that just by watching the behavior of the Black men that went to college and law school with me. There’s usually little to no return on that investment (creating opportunities for African-American men) flowing back to any Black woman at all.
If you look at their mass behavior and not their rhetoric, it’s clear that most African-American men don’t value marriage, and are not concerned about the now-dead “Black family.” African-American men like the status quo situation of their mass refusal to marry the Black women they have sex with and impregnate. From outward appearances, most African-American men are happy with a lifetime of sleeping around without the commitments or responsibilities of marriage.
If you look at their mass behavior, it’s also clear that African-American men are also not particularly concerned about the children they produce.
These “save the dead Black family” discussions are not even a blip on most African-American men’s radar . . . unless Black women start talking about solutions that don’t include continuing to wait around for African-American men—such as interracial marriage and a focus on dating non-African-American Black men (for those Black women who must have a Black man as their husband).
Incidentally, African-American men have long known that Black love is dead. Sometimes, usually while arguing another point, they admit this fact. I recently came across the post In Defense of Muslim Men and Islam from Imam Isa Mateen,
Muslim men are the largest and perhaps only group of men in the Black community that still marry Black women. For the most part, marriage in the Black community, particularly among the 20- 30 yr old, is dead! While there are some Christians or others who still marry – the main group that still regularly marries are the Muslims.
Yes, there are problems with the marriages. But those problems did not come from Islam. They come from our being raised in a non Islamic and anti Islamic environment, where we learned anti Islamic ways, customs, attitudes, habits, and Euro centric thought patterns.
Islam combats the negative, self destructive mores of America and seeks to replace them with clean, respectful relationships. Some of us have cleaned up more than others.
We expect Euro centric Christians and Euro centric, Christianized negroes to attack Islam with their tongues. But it has become fashionable now for our so called Black nationalist brethren to stretch forth their tongues against Muslims as well.
I say “so-called” Black nationalists because one must question the motives of those who attack the Muslims when the Muslims have been a historical ally to Blacks. Not the racist, stand offish, wanna-be White Arab/ Pakistani / Bangladeshi/ immigrants who sell swine, lottery tickets, cigarettes, drug paraphernalia , alcohol and fake halal meat to our people. It is the Imam Jamil Al- Amins and Malik El- Shabazzs (Malcolm X), that have been the friends of the Black community. It is the countless Black Muslims that are community leaders and mediators that have been friends to the Black community. To attack such people is a divide and conquer strategy that should be rather transparent.
. . . A Muslim brother will marry a sister with five, six or seven kids without blinking an eye! That brother will pay tuition, feed, clothe and play with these fatherless children just like their own. Often these children suffer from severe emotional and psychological trauma from their fatherless condition which causes them to act out. The Muslim man will struggle to teach morals and discipline to children that have been left behind by some worthless negro – who’s probably a fake Black nationalist!
. . . Quietly, because Muslims tend to be quiet people, millions of Black children are being raised by Black Muslim men who sometimes lose their lives or their freedom protecting the woman from her crazy-behind, no account baby -daddy.
Remember that the next time some loud mouth, you-tube revolutionary, fake Black nationalist attacks Islam.
Now, what Imam Mateen is saying is true . . . as far as it goes. But there are several critical observations that were glossed over as “problems with the marriages.” It’s beyond the scope of this post to get too far off into this, but I’ll mention a few of the major problems among Sunni (“orthodox”) African-American Muslims. First, yes it’s true that Sunni Muslim Black men do frequently marry Black women. The problem is the word “frequently.” Sunni Muslim Black men often marry with the intention of divorcing the woman in a matter of days, and then moving on to the next “wife.” Basically, these men have a series of religious-ceremony-only “marriages” in order to make their promiscuity religiously “legal.” [If you’re bored and in the mood to wade through oceans of insanity, read this thread where nuts are justifying these temporary “marriages.”]
Second, there is the mass phenomenon of African-American Sunni Muslim males flying off to Morocco to purchase Arab wives. This practice is so widespread that another Sunni Black man blogger felt the need to address that behavior pattern in this post. Then there are the Black male wife-beaters who are attracted to Islam because they like what they hear from Ike Turner Imams who give fake religious justification for abusing women. Imam Mateen has bravely confronted Black male members of what he calls the “wife beater cult”. Then there are Sunni Muslim Black men like Tariq Nelson (who, if I remember correctly, has a nonblack wife) who advocate what he calls “the new passing” as the solution to anti-Black racism from nonblack immigrant Muslims.
Obviously, African-American Islam is not any kind of “Black love” paradise. And neither is the Nation of Islam. Min. Ishmael Muhammad (one of Elijah Muhammad’s many illegitimate children) has a nonblack wife.
THE SOJOURNERS NEED TO GET CLEAR OF BLACK FEMALE “BLACK LOVE” DEAD-ENDERS BEFORE THEY REALIZE THEY’VE BEEN LEFT BEHIND
I said the following during a recent conversation,
Those of us who are serious about living well need to get clear of “Black female-Black Love Dead-Enders.” If sojourners feel like they’re being subjected to hateration right now, just wait—you haven’t seen anything yet. When the BF-Black Love Dead-Enders:
(1) read the results of the latest US Census report (which will document that AA males are on the path to catching up with their British West Indian BM “cousins” in terms of IRR—thank God for that!*),
(2) watch increasing numbers of Sojourners move on into abundant life with husbands from the global village,
(3) and finally let it sink into their heads that NOBODY is coming to their rescue . . .
WATCH OUT! The BF-Black Love Dead-Enders will vent an explosion of hateration toward the sojourners who escaped.
*Why do I say “Thank God!” that AA males’ interracial relationship rates are steadily catching up with those of West Indian BM in the UK? Because a leopard doesn’t change its spots! It’s better for AA males to take their issues and collective damage to nonblack women who can better withstand that damage. Nonblack women are more likely to have supportive family networks that support them when their AA male boyfriends, husbands, and baby daddies abandon them and their children. Leopards don’t change their spots.
Apparently, Caribbean-British BM in the UK have many of the same deficits as AA males. The results of many Caribbean-British BM’s unions with WW in the UK have been thoroughly documented. From the British Journal of Social Work:
SUMMARY It is now well documented that the majority of mixed-parentage children who enter the public care system in Britain have a white biological mother and a black African Caribbean father. This paper explores some of the underlying factors which increase the vulnerability of mixed-parentage children. The situation of white single mothers is examined in the context of ‘race’, class, gender and location in British society. Empirical findings from two recent research studies provide a profile of white single mothers and their children in receipt of social work help and assistance. Areas for further discussion are raised within this framework.
Anyone who has been involved in child welfare in the US has observed similar patterns. It’s quite clear that, regardless of the mother’s race, a HUGE disproportionate percentage of American children in foster care are BM’s children.
The bottom line is that the masses of AA men DON’T do any better by nonblack women and the children they have with these women than what they do with BW and children. The vast majority of AA men CAN’T build or sustain wholesome families. So, it’s best that they take their deficits to some other type of woman.
Anyhoo, when the BF Black Love Dead-Enders who are counting on AA males to “do better” finally wake up from their delusion … there’ll be an implosion among these women. That’s why the rest of us need to get FAR AWAY from these women right now—before they realize that they’ve doomed themselves with their Black Love delusions.
Like many other Sojourners, I’ve had the experience of getting deeply angry stares from some deeply angry Black women when I’m out and about with Mr. White Man. As more of these Black women who have been suffering while waiting for a nonexistent Black prince realize they’ve been left behind, their reactions will only get more extreme. Sojourners, get clear of these “nuthin’ but a Black man”-type of Black women. Now.
YOUR RESOURCES ARE A TERRIBLE THING TO WASTE—ARE YOU WASTING THEM ON NONRECIPROCATING PERSONS?
Evia, blog host of Black Female Interracial Marriage Ezine said the following during a conversation at the previous blog,
Khadija, I had never heard of Van Jones either until I heard bw talking about him a few days ago, saying he was being attacked by “de evil wm.” The second I heard what his position was, I would have bet a very huge amount of money that he either dated non-bw exclusively or that he was married to a non-bw.
There IS a pattern here, yet so many bm think they’re duping others by claiming they just “fell in love” with a non-bw. Well, they actually are duping the masses of AA women, but no one else. So many gaslighted bw will go around like zombies saying, “Well, love is just love” or “You can’t help who you love,” when it comes to AA men. That’s another form of bm protection. I mean, if that’s TRUE and bm can’t help who THEY love, then why is it that so many AA women obviously can stop themselves from loving wm?
PREDICTION: I want any bw reading this to just know that virtually ANY bm who she knows who is upwardly-mobile IS on his way to a non-bw if it’s at all possible. He may be your son, your brother, cousin, young man at your church, but IF he’s upwardly mobile, he more than likely is going to share his upward mobility with a non-bw. I’m not talking about those “struggling” or defeated bm; I’m talking about the ones who more than likely are going to do okay.
Knowing this, you, as an AA woman, need to decide how much you’re willing to invest in creating a non-bw’s comfortable lifestyle because whatever you do to help him, he’s going to share it with her–if it’s within his environment to do so.
It’s not the non-bw’s fault though; it’s mainly bw’s fault for not demanding reciprocity from bm and for continuing to invest in the well-being of others while her own daughters perish.
You may not care about that, but don’t act surprised about any of this because it doesn’t make bw look smart–since other folks can clearly see the pattern. If you haven’t seen this pattern, ask yourself why you haven’t.
This is not about bw’s “attitude” and nothing to do with bw having “too much education,” or any of the usual excuses that AA males give.
These males PREFER non-bw, which is their prerogative as long as they don’t get any investment, support, or protection from bw. That’s the critical piece here: the MONEY TRAIL. Bw–GET SHREWD! Always follow the money trail! Do not invest in lifting up a bm unless he knows there are strings attached and only if you’re going to be able to collect.
If we were to look into this man’s past, we would see where it was mainly countless bw’s time, energy, money, guidance, and protection that put him in his position. We definitely know that it wasn’t any other group of women who lifted him up. . . .
Ladies, now that you’re back from various Christmas gatherings with your (biological) relatives, this is a good time to take stock. Are you investing resources into a Black male nephew, cousin, or anybody else who is on his way to giving those same resources to a nonblack woman? If so, why are you investing in someone who will never invest in any Black woman (usually including his own Black mother)?
A reader named Zoopath recently mentioned taking stock of various folks’ “body of work” relative to supporting Black women,
. . . I make it my business to know the “body of work re: AAW” of any person or organization before I support it. That litmus test has really culled the herd of entities that I feel obligated to support. It’s amazing (in a sad way) how many people expect us to be civil rights mules. . .
Your resources are a terrible thing to waste. Don’t waste them on non-reciprocating people.
LET’S REVIEW THE 2 TAKE-AWAY POINTS FOR SOJOURNERS
There are two main points here:
- Get clear of the “nuthin’ but a Black man”-type of Black women before they wake up and explode; and
- Take a fresh look at your resource trail, and cut off any flow going toward non-reciprocating people.
ADDENDUM—VETTING BEGINS AT HOME
In a comment to this post, a reader named Xai perfectly summed up my second point about our personal resource trails. She said,
I am heartened to hear of your housecleaning of the black males in your immediate circle. I know and have been told that I am very radical in my stance regarding black males. It’s just that I am perplexed, something doesn’t add up. We all know of the huge number of dbrbm yet I always hear black women making exceptions for the males in their families. Can’t be true!
So I ask that black women bring vetting to a personal level. Before vetting males as potential suitors, we must vet the males in our families and jettison those that are found wanting. I too, have had hideous family drama such that I have jettisoned my 4 brothers. None of them ever brought home a black hued woman, only the lightest females they could find, all while continually bashing black women. When they fell on hard times, guess who they expected to bail them out?
Some of the questions we should ask ourselves about our sons/brothers etc is: What is the color and caliber of the women they bring home or associate with? What are the characteristics of the women they revere? Are they there to support/help the women of your family? Do they form relationships with women who look like you? Have they produced children? Are they caring for those children financially and emotionally? How do they treat women in general? Is there a difference in treatment based on hue?
This isn’t rocket science! The truth starts at home, if we refuse to see the bs in our own homes how can we steer clear of it in the real world? It’s time for utter, brutal truth in 2011.
Xai is absolutely right. The truth starts at home. Vetting starts at home.
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